The Honey Badger and The Bear

Happy Monday morning! I hope you all had a great, full weekend. I’m coming off of a busy one, but it was chock-full of all the good things. Mario worked the majority of the weekend so I was holding down the fort and attending Saturday celebrations all by myself. Thankfully we had a window to attend church yesterday morning and guess what the teaching was on?! The Blessing of Marriage 🙂

At the beginning of the service they did a little game with a few couples they brought on stage called the, Not So Newlywed Game. One of the questions they had to answer was what animal would your spouse say they are most like. Mario and I played along and got it right. He would pick the bear, and I would pick the honey badger.

Here are some characteristics of the bear from https://onekindplanet.org/animal/bear/

Amazing Facts About the Bear

• Bears are extraordinarily intelligent animals. They have far superior navigation skills to humans; excellent memories; large brain to body ratio; and use tools in various contexts from play to hunting.
• Bears grieve deeply for others. Cubs are known to moan and cry when separated from their mothers.  This can go on for weeks if their mothers are killed by hunters.
• Bears have excellent senses of smell, sight and hearing. They can smell food, cubs, a mate or predators from miles away. Their great eyesight allows them to detect when fruits are ripe.
• Some species of Asiatic bear build nests in the trees. They can use these for hiding, eating and even sleeping.
• Bears care deeply about family members. They will risk their lives and even fight to the death in order to save a cub or sibling from danger.

I have always called Mario “My Bear” because he gives such good hugs and the facts about bears above do describe his personality especially how he cares deeply about his family and his protective nature. I love him for this and so much more.

Here’s a little fun fact about honey badgers from https://facts.net/nature/animals/honey-badger-facts/

Honey badgers do not back down.

One of the most interesting honey badger facts is that the Guinness Book of World Records listed honey badgers as the “most fearless animal in the world”. This claim is backed up by actual honey badger behavior. Honey badgers aren’t afraid of facing animals much larger than them, and will fiercely fight to the death if not left alone. 

They will also fiercely attack any intruders that come across their dens. Honey badgers have been observed to challenge large mammals into fights, such as Cape buffalos and rhinoceroses.

When Mario first saw a YouTube video about honey badgers he looked at me and said, “That’s you! You don’t turn from a fight and you don’t give up.”

These animals both have one thing in common, they are protective and will fight to protect. I guess that was my take away yesterday among other encouraging marriage reminders, it was the fact that Mario and I are different in many ways, but God reminded us that these characteristics are designed by Him to bring about good in our lives and the lives of those around us.

At the beginning of this year we made a huge decision to push aside all the other competing priorities in our lives and put our marriage first. We pulled back from so many things because God was pointing us in the direction of getting our lives back in the order He created: God first, our spouse and then everyone/everything else. It was SO hard. It still is sometimes. The decision came about by way of heartbreaking, gut-wrenching, agonizing circumstances that made it clear we could not go on like that. It was pain and hurt that pushed us in the direction we needed to go. Believe me when I say this decision didn’t come without judgement from onlookers, and it cost us tremendously. I have to say this though, we are now four months into our decision and have never been more fulfilled, balanced and blessed in our marriage. God is teaching us to cherish each other like never before so we are able to apprehend the blessing that is our marriage. It is hard, but we chose to obey God, and He is honoring that obedience.

That’s my encouragement for all of us today. If God is calling you to great change in your life…pray, pray and pray some more and then OBEY. He will multiply that obedience. It may not make sense to anyone and may not even make sense to you but it means peace – a peace that surpasses all understanding, and I don’t know about you but this Monday morning, this girl right here, she wants peace, the peace that only the Lord can give as we trust and follow Him.

Have a great week! Know that I am trusting and obeying right alongside you all!

With all my heart,

Sonia

What Happened to Putting in the Work?

Yup. Pretty much!

Ok this is going to be a weird post, so let me just say that out of the gate here. Thank you D.C. for helping me with the title of this blog post. Lately I have been hearing stories of young ladies who want to marry a man that can take care of them financially (the words sugar daddy come to mind as I am typing this). There is nothing wrong with wanting to date someone who has goals and is responsible, but I am not sure about this whole expectation of a certain tax bracket! I heard a quote once that says something along the lines of, “Some women want to marry a general but aren’t willing for them to be soldiers first.” I think this is true.

I also know there are more than enough stories of men who were married during their rise in careers only to leave their wives for other women once they reached their success so I am not letting the guys off the hook here either, but I am really wondering what happened to couples putting in the work? What happened to growing together? Why are we an entitled society that expects the perfect insta-worthy house, car, job, spouse at the blink of an eye? How the heck did we get here?

Now, I do love a turn-key house like the next person, but there is something to be said about all those HGTV shows we all love so much that give us a glimpse of the process of building and show what it actually takes to make that beautiful reveal! Basically, I am writing about the “hard work” part of relationships or anything in life, really! Let’s not skip that part! Let’s not fast forward to the pinnacle without the glorious parts of putting in the work. It means so much more that way!

I guess that is what I am trying to say here, that good things take time. It doesn’t have to be perfect at the beginning. I met my husband when he was a full-time musician, and I was going through a Medical Assisting program. We had no idea how to handle our finances (we are still learning), and we had so many things we wanted to accomplish in life, but were nowhere near that when we met. I don’t even think we had a clue where life would take us, but thankfully we did it together. Thankfully we turned our lives to God in 2009 and grew into the fiercely passionate, persevering people we are today. Thankfully we didn’t side step the process to exchange each other for our “ideal” because we would have missed out on all this. Our marriage is so much more valuable because we are growing together, that is the beauty of putting the work in. My life with my husband is NEVER boring, I promise you that, and I love what God has done with our marriage. He has honored the work we have put in & continue to put in!

My prayer for all you singles (and maybe some of us married folk, as well) is that we set aside all our entitlement issues and put in the work, that we get some therapy, some accountability, humble ourselves and most importantly that we do not despise the small beginnings that God brings. We have got to start somewhere! Thank you for reading and sharing! Have a blessed rest of the week 🙂

With all my heart, Sonia